How to Build an Unbreakable Human: An Open Letter to My Bully

Dear Bully, You tried to break me. Thankfully resilient people are hard to break. They get knocked down just like everyone else, but have a tendency to soldier on – more often than not – a little bit stronger than before. I’m not saying it’s been easy. Fear tactics work for a reason. It helps to have […]

How to Exercise Your Mindfulness Muscle

Few of us have been taught how to sit with our thoughts and feelings. As a result we are vulnerable to getting hooked and triggered. Awareness, attention and curiosity allow us to take control of our thinking and respond by choice instead of reactive habit. Lack of awareness keeps us in a state of autopilot, […]

Thoughts, Beliefs and Multiple Me’s

Much of life is spent trying to manage our self-images. Closely related to our self-images are our identities – how we define ourselves according to the roles we play. Both our self-images and our identities become part of the stories we spin about ourselves. Our stories are almost always a skewed version of the truth […]

The Sacred Start

Our understanding of love has been hijacked and beguiled by its first distracting moving moments. We have allowed our love stories to end way too early. We seem to know far too much about how love starts, and recklessly little about how it might continue. p 15 Love means admiration for qualities in the lover that promise to […]

Collect Memories, Not Stuff

I used to pride myself in knowing the only shopping I enjoyed was for produce. For me, a day at the Farmer’s Market was and is nothing short of a spiritual experience, while going to the mall is like a visit to the Inferno. That pristine image was forever changed the day I signed up […]

The Power of Letting Go

“The willingness to accept responsibility for one’s own life is the source from which self-respect springs.” – Joan Didion When asked if people were doing the best they can, a mentor once said: “I don’t know. All I know is that my life is better when I assume that people are doing their best. It […]

Self-Stories

“Life does not consist mainly, or even largely, of facts or happenings. It consists mainly of the storm of thoughts that is forever flowing through one’s head.”  ~ Mark Twain The other day I had a face down in the arena moment. Someone didn’t “like” a post I shared on Facebook. I felt hurt and the […]

Why Connect?

“What is the value of social support if we are ultimately alone?” This good question came my way recently and gave me pause to think. There are many ways to go with it. One way I understand reaching out is for the journey itself. For years I found it difficult to accept that people come […]

Childhood Play

Understanding how we played as children, what we liked and didn’t like, is a key component toward bringing back play into our adult lives. Childhood play tells us about the things that came naturally to us. For example, as a child I loved to explore. I used to drop little objects in a shoe box […]