Rewiring Joy

Thanks to neuroscience, we now know the brain/nervous system is capable of change. That means with enough effort, skill and time a person can do a lot to overcome the effects of painful experiences. The catch is that the survival lessons of our ancestors required they be good at learning from bad experiences. This skill […]


I’d like to share a simple yet highly effective technique for building self-acceptance. Start a phrase using an example you feel sadness, pain, or regret about: “Even though (experience, behavior or feelings) … Then add the self-acceptance piece: “I (was/am) doing the best I (could/can).” No matter where you are in life, no matter what […]

Dis-ease of Affluence

Our brains developed over the last few millennia to help us navigate in a natural environment. Cave dwellers at heart and farmers at best, we have yet to catch up to the advances of technology. Gadgets are great. The convenience of texting and tweeting have made them the new gold standard of communication; while digital […]

Canvas of Life

“Live! Live the wonderful life that is in you! Let nothing be lost upon you. Be always searching for new sensations. Be afraid of nothing.” ―Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray James Hollis says the task of adult life is to give back projections. This is a bold and empowering statement. He asks that we dig […]

Virtues of Solitude

I gratuitously extol the virtues of connection, all the while knowing everyone needs a little alone time. In quiet solitude we discover who we really are and what are lives are about. Be it sitting silently with yourself a few minutes a day or turning inward for winter’s reflection, time alone is the ultimate antidote […]

Slowing Down to Chase the Light

The sun went into hiding this week and I joined it, by burying myself in work. Life was moving fast from under the pile. So when the sun broke through, I grabbed my camera and gladly followed. I’m walking around, looking for light. The house is peaceful and quiet. Even if my life had not […]

Our Inherent Goodness

In a previous post (Cross-Cultural Spirituality), I wrote about a friend who sent me a copy of her rabbi’s Elul. It speaks eloquently to a personally belief of mine that carries over into my professional behavior. Namely, that we are born inherently good and that we heal by connecting with others.  Elul 10/September 5 “Sometimes, we stray […]

Emotional Regulation

Most of us learned as children that our negative feelings were in some way unacceptable, or even dangerous. As a result, when our own child has a meltdown our inner child gets triggered. We feel a sense of panic and react with fight, flight or freeze. It’s the very same panic that caused our own […]