Tea Ritual

This morning was daylight savings Sunday and I woke unusually early. I could hear the small pattering of rain leftover from the night. I headed for the kitchen and heated some water. Every morning, I spend a few minutes sitting quietly with a cup of tea. For the last ten years or so, I’ve spent […]

Unhook and Let Go

It’s no secret. I hawk freedom for living. My “theory of change” revolves around the idea that we are stuck in habituated ways of being that are no longer serving our best selves. For most of its young life, psychology’s main job has been to discover how past events influence present behavior. That’s the traditional […]

Awareness

There’s a joke in yoga that asks, “If you had to hide something that was the most valuable thing you had, where would you hide it?” The answer is: “in the present moment.” Ouch. Very funny, yoga. We all know the best humor has more than a grain of truth in it. And the truth is, […]

The Middle Ground

Emotional management tends to fall into two categories, externalizing or internalizing. When we express our emotions without discretion, we hand them over to the outside world where we hope they’ll be noticed, honored, and transformed. While this expression of true feeling can be healthy at times, it isn’t always the best way to work with […]

Our Human Folly

The history of humanity is a tale of human folly. Globally and individually, despite our best intentions, we find ourselves replaying old habits of thinking, feeling, and behaving that we know will only get us into trouble. Gratefully, we have the capacity to stop the madness, turn our attention inward, dismantle our delusions, and build […]

Waking Up to What Is

Have you ever had the experience of discovering something new, like a word or phrase, then overnight you read and hear it seemingly everywhere? It was always there, you just didn’t know it. Positivity is like that. It changes how your mind works. It doesn’t just change the contents of your mind it changes the scope, widening the span of possibilities that […]

Fuel for Anxiety, Part II

A while back I posted about the subtle ways we feed anxious thinking. Here are some of the most common anxiety-fueled thought patterns, plus some specific ways you can recognize and dispute them. If some of these sound familiar to you, put them in your mental tool kit so you can take them out when you need […]

Tail-Chasing

Imagine a dog chasing his own tail, reaching a point of severe exhaustion, but still pressing round in tight little circles. The more frustrated he gets, the faster he tries to run and the faster he tries to run, the more frustrated he gets. But he becomes so used to the running that it no […]

Fuel for Anxiety

Cognitive psychologists have found that the process of identifying and disputing irrational thoughts is a very effective way to short-circuit the anxiety cycle so we can regain our equilibrium, think more clearly, and feel a lot better. So the next time you’re feeling anxious, walk yourself through these three steps. Remind yourself that anxiety naturally […]

Patience

Patanjali teaches that when you enter the stage of perfect wholeness, there is a calmness and a clarity that reflect prefect presence. The antidote to impatience is allowing yourself to reenter the flow of things, that is, to be in sync with the speed with which things are happening. Beneath the thought “I am wasting […]